


Kadan, Vhen'an

by BunanTsokolatte



Series: Shenri Lavellan [1]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bullavellan, F/M, Fluff, Hot Chocolate, Iron Bull Appreciation Month, Iron Bull Appreciation Month 2016, Love Confessions, Smut, bullmance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-16
Updated: 2016-06-29
Packaged: 2018-04-21 00:32:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4808078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BunanTsokolatte/pseuds/BunanTsokolatte
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One-shots of the relationship between Inquisitor Shenri Lavellan and the Iron Bull.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You Will

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shenri finds herself comforted by Bull after her temper explodes before her war advisors.
> 
> Written after the release of the Trespasser DLC trailer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, there's...there's _smut_ in this...how did that get there? I didn't put that there... :x
> 
> Alas, this wasn't supposed to be smut but here we are. xD
> 
> Also, this was written in excitement for the Trespasser DLC _trailer_ so keep in mind that, although I have beaten Trespasser thrice now, this is based on assumption from the trailer that there was the council, quizzie got pissed, and then went to her room to brood.

  
Inquisitor Lavellan slammed the door behind her and walked to the desk in a few angry strides. She gripped the “Fucking  _shemlen_ ,” she spat to the silence of her and Bull's guest chambers. Rage filled her to the brim but in the back of her mind, a glimmer of guilt prodded at her. Meeting those in the Inquisition had kept her from calling them that so often. She shouldn't spit that word like a slur, but damn her if she wasn't frustrated with the ones she just met with.  _I fix Orlais when it couldn't fix itself. I save Ferelden. I save the fucking_  world _from a darkspawn magister and his dragon and all these people can do is_ complain?

“Ugh!” she cried out, slamming her marked fist as hard as she could against the desk. She let it root itself there for a moment, clenching itself against the wood in frustration. She turned her hand over to study the palm and tried not to think about how she could no longer feel anything in this hand. The Anchor had been webbing itself below her wrist like spider's silk for months. Now, a red blotchiness joined it from where she struck the table. She sighed at the unattractive sight, letting both of her hands open to clutch the edge. She needed it to ground her, to keep herself from throwing her daggers at various objects in the room.

She felt as if her mind was falling apart, as if she was ripping at the seams. Creators knew she did love her work. Being able to uplift the weak and feeling the support of so many made her feel her work was worth it. She had left the life of the clan troublemaker, filling her new role better than she had expected. This organization had revealed strength she didn't know she possessed. But when it came to conflicts like these, she could hardly remember how she had handled this for over two years.

Now, the fucking Anchor that had been with her since the new Inquisition began was trying to  _murder_  her. She could no longer count the number of times her party had to stop as the mark glowed and whipped her into the air and dirt. She could no longer keep track of how often she woke Bull when it thrashed her about the floor in the middle of the night. She felt terrible for her inner circle who always seemed to look at her now like a bomb about to blow. She felt for Bull who always held her and calmed her in the darkness of their bedroom. He would rub her back and make love to her until she could believe all was normal. She noticed him yawning and rubbing his single, bleary eye these days as a result.

She didn't want to be a burden to her people. She didn't want to be the dying little knife-eared Inquisitor too broken to lead. She wished it would be like two years ago when everyone needed her and knew they could rely on her. She couldn't be angry or sad right now. She needed to rein it in. She needed to be the strong, confident leader her peers, the _world_ , knew her to be. She needed to--

And then she felt Bull's warm, familiar hand cup her back with that comforting touch she loved so much. The floodgate broke. With a gasp, tears began to stream down her face. She found herself starving for breath. She tried to breathe but couldn't get enough no matter how much air she sucked in.

“I'm s-sorry,  _v-vhen_ _'_ _an_...” she choked out, sputtering between sobs.

Without a word, Bull placed his hand under her knees and lifted her, carrying her to the couch. He plopped himself down and cradled his Inquisitor to him. Shenri's body continued to heave for breath. She focused on the feeling of his large arms encircling her, keeping her safe from the rest of the world. Bull's heart wrenched at the sight of his gasping love, curled up and shaking in his lap. He felt himself tugged forward as her slim fingers tightened around the strap of his harness. Her knuckles blanched under the exertion.

“Count for me,  _kadan_ ,” he commanded as he stroked her hair.

Shenri closed her eyes, trying to fight the lightheaded feeling as she continued to try to get air. She focused on the feeling of Bull's fingers on her scalp as she counted, “ _Sa...ta...t-_ ah!” The mark on her hand crackled but she shook her head and kept going. “ _Tan...ny...va...no...”_

She had counted to fifty before she calmed down. It was quiet now. The only sound breaking the silence was Shenri's sniffing and deep breathing. She was sideways on Bull's lap, her legs across his and her cheek resting against his chest. Her fingers toyed with the dragon's tooth that matched hers. She wished she could just sleep; her attack had only worsened her fatigue. She was sure the crazy amount of makeup she applied each day was a mess of colored tear streaks on her cheeks now. The tears and sweat made disheveled strands of hair stick to her face. What must Bull think of her now, the tough, wise boss he was so proud of reduced to a crying little girl?

“I've got you. You're safe,” he reminded her, planting a kiss to the side of her head. The tenderness in his voice made her want to cry all over again.

She mustered a small smile for him as his large, gentle fingers continued to comb through her hair. “I wish you didn't have to catch me all the time. I wish I could be stronger about this. I remember you admiring my toughness when I saved the world.”

“You have one of the toughest jobs in the world,  _kadan,_ and you  _are_  tough enough for it. You're allowed to cry about it once in awhile. Besides, you know my big, buff arms are great for cradling.”

If Shenri wanted to protest, she didn't. She just nodded and ground her head against his chest as if hoping to root herself there. They sat in silence for a few moments. Bull could see the gears turning in her head as her eyes fixated themselves on a spot on the floor.

“ _Vhen_ _'_ _an_...” she croaked, the knot in her throat not yet unraveled. He might have cried at the tenderness with which she said the endearment.

“ _Kadan_ ,” he acknowledged, a dark feeling settling in his gut at what she would say next.

“I love you,” she began, “but we both know...” She trailed off and Bull saw her throat shift as she gulped hard. “If I don't live after this--”

“ _Katoh,_ ” he countered.

Shenri's eyes flitted to his face, a mix of disbelief and sadness in her expression. “Bull, we can't avoid--”

“No, we can't,” he interrupted. “But I'm going to destroy everyone in my way if it means finding a way to fix that mark.  _You are going to make it._ ”

Her eyes searched his face and the way he looked at her, full of determination and ferocity, was too much. In a flash, she was sitting up on her knees with her arms around his neck, hugging him in gratitude and love. Bull cradled her small form against him, one hand snug on her back and the other on her backside. He buried his nose in the curve of her slim neck to take in her scent. He squeezed her just an inch tighter to feel her pressed that much more against him.

He felt her lips press against his temple, then her teeth worrying his ear lobe. There was a slow, unhurried mask to it, as if she did not want to rush. But he could feel the insistence behind each kiss as it trailed to his lips. She captured them with a desperate gasp. She pressed pecks against his mouth with intensifying speed.

“Bull...” she whimpered against his lips as her hands slid down his chest and stomach. She teased him with a swipe of her tongue to his lip.

“Yes?” he groaned as her fingers curled beneath the waistband of his pants.

“Take me,” she sighed as her hand wrapped around his length.

Bull stiffened at his lover's touch, and he set about satisfying her. He lifted his hips to shove his trousers down, freeing his hardening length from the fabric. Shenri lifted herself as she felt his hands travel up her thighs to bunch her dress up to her waist. She reached back to undo the buttons in the back. Bull's hand joined hers, wanting to remove the luxurious blue fabric faster. He tugged it over her head and toss it somewhere at the edge of the room. Her perky breasts were bare before him. She had been unable to wear a band with that dress cutting almost to her navel in the front. The Iron Bull hummed in appreciation. He worked and kneaded one mound just the way she liked. He savored the moan she gifted him with in response when he pinched the tip and twisted. Lavellan's practiced hands undid his harness, maneuvering it around his horns. The Iron Bull's other hand tugged off her smalls and she worked her legs out of the undergarments. She brought a leg over to straddle him and felt two large fingers trace her seam. She felt pleasure crackle throughout her body, already so sensitive from his sudden touch. His growl at her slickness and sensitivity joined her moan. She wasted no time guiding him to her entrance and lowering herself onto him.

The elf groaned at the familiar fullness her qunari lover gave her. His thick, long cock always hit her in just the right spot. Her pelvis squirmed against his and the Bull wasted no time obliging her. He immediately lifting his hips to thrust into her, cradling her ass in one hand. He felt the Inquisitor's thighs clamp around his sides as she bucked back against him. Adoration joined his want for her as she cupped her small hands around his face. He looked up at her face, the tears having washed all the make-up away, and her natural blush filled her cheeks. He studied her long eyelashes for a moment before she opened her eyes too. Memories flooded his head as he stared into the same bright green eyes he had looked into for the past few years. He remembered the laughter in them as she zipped through their enemies when they first met. He remembered their grief when he found her in the mountains, mourning her clan. He remembered their dreaminess when she drank. He remembered their shyness as she held out the pair of necklaces she made for them and their bliss when she came. He refused to see that glitter gone from that green.

That same bliss was in her eyes now. It was accompanied by the natural blush in her cheeks and the moans that always made him crazy to bring her to her high. But there was sadness in it there as they locked eyes. She was still thinking of her death and worrying about leaving him alone should it happen. She needed to believe and he needed to make it clear how this was going to go. Her eyes widened as he brought a hand to fist in her hair and gave it a firm tug to keep her gaze on him.

“You are  _not_  going to die,  _kadan,_ ” he proclaimed. He thrusted into her, wringing a gasp out of her. “We are going to the save the fucking world--”

Another thrust...

" --and then you will stay right here with me. We are gonna travel the world together--”

Another gasp...

“--and I am going to take you. **Just** \--”

A thrust...

“-- **like** \--”

_Gasp!_

"-- **this**. Until you can't remember your name.”

If Bull's emotions betrayed what he was saying, he never gave off any signals. But at this point, Shenri  _knew._  He was as scared shitless as she was. He would not let her down as her place of comfort. He punctuated it with every thrust and every word, and she could see the fear and ferocity in his eyes. He was doing anything to get her to feel the hope and life they would have after this was over.

Creators, she loved this man  _so fucking much._

“Oh,  _vhen_ _'_ _an_ ,” she moaned, helpless to do anything else but hold on tight as he kept plunging into her. He growled at the endearment on her lips. He could hearing her voice thick with love for him but could  _feel_  the pleasure she felt coiling within her. Every part of her clung to him from hands to her hot core. Her arms wound about his neck and she pulled herself until she was flush against him. She took their dragon's teeth in hand, rejoining them behind Bull as she embraced him. She drowned in the feeling of their damp chests pressed together and of his lips swallowing her moans. She wanted more of his bruising grip on her form, of his hard member pounding into her. She felt his love and pride in her in each hard kiss and buck. It was like his signature for her and it threatened to unravel her. Elvhen dripped from her tongue as she held on and ascended to that ecstatic plane.

“ _Ar lath ma...ar lath ma...pala em...pala em_ _elvar'el_ _!”_ she chanted, bringing her hands up to grip his horns. Bull growled. His blood always boiled whenever she held onto his horns and begged him to fuck her in the elvhen tongue. His teeth bit down hard on the crook of her neck and Shenri let out a yelp that was equal parts pain and pleasure. The sharp feeling made her soar and she felt herself right there on the edge.

“Come for me,  _kadan_ ,” Bull ordered against her neck.

He bit down harder and it sent her falling over the edge. With a single, shrill cry of his name, she threw her head back and shuddered around him.

“ _Vhen_ _'_ _an! Rosa'da'din in'em, sathan, sathan, sathan!"_ she sobbed. He followed her command as if a spell had been cast. His teeth flattened against the front of her throat and he gave her his hardest thrusts. Then, there was a hoarse, guttural roar and he was filling her with his warm seed.

They came down together panting. Bull felt himself lulled by the feeling of her thumb running along his cheekbone. Likewise, Shenri liked how snugly Bull was holding her. She knew he would not be letting her go anytime soon. She gave a contented sigh and they shared a kiss, levels chaster the ones they had shared just moments ago. Their foreheads found each other again and the lovers shared a small, private smile. Bull wouldn't say it but he was glad he could still make her smile, even at a moment like this. His favorite part of their lovemaking was seeing her dissolve into a big contented smile.

Another kiss drew him from his thoughts. “I love you,” she murmured.

He smiled back at her. “I love you too,  _kadan_.”

Her smile grew and she brought herself an inch closer. She stayed like that for a moment before  whispering, “I  _will_  come back to you." Her forehead nuzzled his. 

“You will,” he said, his hands squeezing her closer.

There was fear and doubt buried deep down but here, in each other's arms, they could believe. Here, it was enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just realized this is kind of a sad one to start this collection of one-shots with. I'll write some more lighthearted ones later. xD
> 
> Translations:  
>  _Ar lath ma...ar lath ma...pala em...pala em_ _elvar'el_ _!”_ = "I love you...I love you...fuck me...fuck me harder!"  
>  _Rosa'da'din in'em, sathan, sathan, sathan!_ = "Come inside me, please, please, please!"
> 
> Elvhen courtesy of the fantastic Fenxshiral and the Thedas Language Project's Project Elvhen. Of fucking _course_ I finally use it in fanfiction and it's for dirty things... :x
> 
> I would also like to thank thievinghippo because this got finished as a result of finally joining her Hippo's Creativity Challenge to improve my writing :D
> 
> I swear, Iron Bull is the reason I can't pick just Cullen as my favorite LI for this game. They're both too awesome for different reasons.
> 
> I keep a tag of Shenri here if you wish to see more of her: www.bunan-tsokolatte.tumblr.com/tagged/shenri-lavellan .
> 
> Thanks for reading! :)


	2. One Sweet, Cocoa Morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Modern AU) The morning after one of Shenri's sleepovers at Bull's place, the two confess their deeper feelings for one another over a cup of cocoa. Fluffy goodness for the Bullmance week of Iron Bull Appreciation Month 2016 on Tumblr. :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has got to be the cheesiest title I've ever come up with for a chapter/fic but nothing else was fitting. xD

The sound of chirping birds, always occupying the tree outside Bull's apartment, woke Shenri. She pouted to herself, wanting nothing more than to sleep for just another hour. She curled up and rolled to Bull’s side of the bed, wanting to be held in his arms. But she found his side of the bed empty, feeling only the sheets beneath her arm as she felt around for him. She pouted again but then heard the click of the stove from the kitchen, and she let herself relax.

She turned onto her back and stretched. She felt the familiar, delicious soreness a night with Bull always left her with. Today, she felt it between her legs, around her neck, and around her wrists. She smiled wide and bit her lip remembering the night before when they played with the collar and cuffs. He had her hands bound with the cuffs and tugged her to him by a leash attached to the collar. He’d pull her close to whisper filth into her ears as he filled her or tug her to get her to look into his eyes. His command and the strain of the collar left her begging with tears pricking at her eyes. But it only made the stars burst that much brighter each time he sent her into bliss.

She also remembered afterwards when he was cleaning her up with a towel. He cradled her in his arms, murmuring praises to her of her strength and beauty. Every word left her blushing, her heart clenching at every comforting caress. Creators, she had fallen  _hard_. It had never felt like this before.  _Love._ She felt it every time her cheeks hurt from smiling with him. She felt it every time he fretted over her after a hard battle. She knew that they had become more serious since she approached him. She had been all nerves and anxiety when she presented him with those dragon tooth necklaces. And the way he looked at her that day, the way he made love to her right after...she knew she was a goner.

She suspected, hoped, that he loved her too. But even then, would this union between them last? She had recruited him and his Chargers for the Inquisition’s cause. She’d jump for joy if they decided to stay even after Corypheus was gone. But would he even  _want_  to stay? Would the Inquisition still be a worthy cause to him after they vanquished their enemy? Would  _she?_

She shook her head. She couldn’t dwell over this now, not when Corypheus was still out there and they had yet to cross this bridge. Not when her hunky Qunari was in the kitchen, cooking up something for the two of them.

She sat up and pivoted to touch her feet to the cool ground. She caught her reflection in the mirror and turned to appraise the bruises on her ass. She smiled, happy with the large, purple badges of honor. She walked over to his dresser, pulling out the bottom one and plucking out the first shirt she could find. A white button-up today. She threw it over her head and it floated down to drape around her, dwarfing her lithe form. She opened a smaller drawer, finding her panties she had left whenever she came over. Bull, as usual, had washed them for her and she fished out a lavender pair, working her legs through the holes. Satisfied, she stepped through the bedroom door to find her lover.

As she stepped through the doorway to the kitchen, she was greeted by the sight of her lover’s broad back. The smile that came over her was so big she almost wanted to slap herself. She remembered wanting to do the same to her lovesick peers in her clan as she grew up. Yet here she was, a lost cause over the giant hunk of a Qunari with whom she shared everything. She also sent a rare, silent thanks to the Creators. His back muscles (his  _everything_ , really) convinced her that maybe they existed after all.

She watched for a short moment as he poured milk into the pot. He began to stir it with a large spoon that looked microscopic in his colossal hand. She treaded on her silent, rogue fee so as not to alert him to her presence. She wouldn’t have been surprised if his Ben-Hassrath senses had already detected her. When she reached him, she let her fingers graze him at the base of his neck and run down the length of his spine. She smiled at the little shiver he gave off from her touch. She wrapped her arms around him, closing her eyes to bask in his body heat as she pressed her cheek against his back.

“Mmm, good morning,  _kadan_ ,” Bull rumbled. He smiled at her over his shoulder and slid one of his large hands over a slim one that had found its way to his pec.

“Good morning,  _vhen’an_ ,” she returned, planting a kiss to his shoulder blade.

They stayed like that for a moment. Bull basked in the embrace of his elvhen lover’s tiny arms as he stirred the warming milk. Only the sounds of the subtle hiss of the stove and the spoon clanking against the sides of the pot filled the room. He noticed from the beginning that she touched people often. Even before their arrangement, her touches had been teasing with everyone. They had been flirtier still with him. They were even more so now that they were together. It could be a finger trailing down his jaw line in the tavern or all her fingers wrapped around the length of him in bed. But he had to admit, he  _really_  liked this sweet part of her that made her content just to be around him. He couldn’t recall anyone ever having touched him the way she did, and he would enjoy every moment of it.

When she finally pulled away, Bull’s hand closed around her arm and tugged her back to him. She squealed as she felt his other arm hoist her up around the waist. She barely registered the sound of the spoon he had been holding dropping into the pan. They laughed together, the sounds melting together when Bull lifted Shenri to kiss her. Bull felt her slim legs lock around his waist. It was so chaste and affectionate in comparison to their passionate night before. He squeezed her tighter in turn and she sighed as she laced her arms around his neck. Shenri clawed at his back in an attempt to find purchase and bring them closer. She felt Bull’s hands snake down to her ass, squeezing the cheeks. Her laugh echoed in his mouth. She always liked the way he handled her, inside and outside of the bedroom. She felt the pull of gravity as Bull tilted her into a dip. She laughed once more, Bull relishing the feel of her smile against his.

He finally set her down when the smell of milk beginning to scald hit his nose. He turned off the heat of the stove and ladled the hot milk into the mugs he set aside. He stirred in the cocoa, watching the white liquid turn light brown on the surface. The darker brown powder pockets on top disappeared into the whirlpool the spoon created. He handed the mug to Shenri who took it with a peck pressed to his cheek in gratitude. She turned to make her way to the couch and yelped as Bull slapped her ass. He made sure it was a tap in comparison to the way he normally would so as not to spill the cocoa he just made for her. She threw a smirk over her shoulder at him, more salacious than it was chastising. His own smile darkened at her. She sauntered over to the sofa, swinging her hips. She knew Bull’s eyes were glued to her backside. Her pelvis moved tantalizingly through the oversized, near-transparent shirt. She sat at the end and picked up the paper, sifting through the articles as she sipped her cocoa.

Bull watched Shenri on the couch as he poured his own cocoa. One shoulder was covered up by the wavy, apricot locks that he adored so much. The other was temptingly bare where the shirt had fallen off. He listened to her sip the hot chocolate he made for her. He remembered how he had introduced the treat to her and how she had come to love it as much as he did. He watched her tongue flick out to lick the remaining sweetness off her lips, bare of makeup. He studied her face. It was always dangerously beautiful with her makeup. The clash of colors complemented her carefree personality. But she was just as beautiful without. Her gold eyelashes were subtle against the jade green of her eyes. He could see the softness of her dark pink lips better when absent of the red rouge she painted them with.

He couldn't help but think how much he liked waking up to this sight.

“You're staring,” the woman of his affections noted, a knowing smirk on her face. Her eyes flitted from the paper to his face, mischief glinting in their green.

“Just thinking,” he stated, walking over to the couch to join her with his own mug of steaming chocolate. “I like seeing you on my couch.”

“ _Just_  on your couch?”

“Well, among other things,” he said suggestively, taking a seat next to her. Shenri swung her legs over his lap, leaning her back against the arm of the couch. Bull’s free hand stroked her knees and calves as he sipped his chocolate.

They sat in comfortable silence for a moment. Bull enjoyed his chocolate and Shenri did the same while reading the paper. After awhile, though, he stole a glance at her and the paper sat in her lap while her gaze was lost in some spot on the floor. Her mouth, usually smiling wherever she went, was neutral and almost pursed.

He trailed his hand to her feet, running a finger over the ticklish soles of her feet. She looked at him as her foot twitched from the contact. “Something on your mind,  _kadan?_ ” Bull asked.

She stared at him, collecting herself for a moment before she asked. “Does this... _us_...do anything for you?”

 _Ah. Her shy voice,_  thought Bull, knowing this wasn’t an easy thing for her to ask.

“I feel like ever since it started, it's been just about making  _my_  life easier. You’re so...good to me, Bull,” she continued. Her eyes were glassy as she met his gaze. “And yet I feel like I give you nothing in return. I feel like I'm using you if you don't get anything out of this.”

“I  _do_  get something out of it. I get  _you, kadan_ ,” Bull reassured, bringing a hand up to the right side of her face to tuck her hair behind her ear. His fingertips grazed down her cheek as he spoke until he could hold her chin, tipping her face to his. “Your strength, your voice, that way you tense up when I grab hold of your waist from behind, the way your tits bounce when I pin your arms and take you on the side of the bed...” Shenri had to chuckle at that. Bull dropped his hand. “I'm good. But I do want to make sure this makes things easier on your end.”

“Not  _this. You_  make things easier on my end,” she clarified. She grasped his hand as best as she could with her tiny one. Bull felt her fingers shaking as she gripped him, and her next words told him why. “I love you,” she finally confessed.

She was looking at him so tenderly he could feel himself melting. The Qunari never had sex for love, and he never felt a romantic inclination towards anyone. He knew what he felt towards his Chargers, towards his friends in the Inquisition was love. But it wasn’t like this. That kind of love wasn’t her smart mouth telling jokes or pressing sweet kisses against his lips. It wasn’t the way she danced in battle, a storm of daggers and Anchor light. It certainly wasn’t her eyes where he could see her emotions naked, vulnerable, and hopeful as they swam in the peridot. Her words opened a door, and he could finally confirm what he’d felt for her all along.

“You going soft on me,  _kadan?_ ” he joked, wanting to lift the heaviness from the air just a little.

She laughed and gave him a small smile, relishing in his humor and efforts to keep her at ease. He had a feeling she knew what it meant, but he wanted to be sure she understood how invested in her he was. He caught her gaze again when he stretched a hand towards her face. He laced his fingers through her hair. The other hand crept beneath his shirt to her soft, toned stomach.

“I love you too,” he murmured as he laid her down, capturing her sigh of relief and joy in his mouth.

They kissed for what seemed to be an eternity. One of Bull's hand cradled her head. The other explored the curves beneath the oversized shirt. He loved the way Shenri’s hands journeyed along the length of his horns and neck. Her fingernails took time trailing over the contours of his back. When they finally broke apart, neither could stop smiling. Bull laughed as her nose--her  _adorable_  nose--brushed lovingly against his.

“Move in with me?” she asked, opening her eyes to him with a happy smile on her face.

He matched her smile with his own. “Will do,” he replied. He worked his shirt over her head and began their celebration with another kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I headcanon Shenri as someone who had never tried chocolate until Bull introduces it to her through hot chocolate. She becomes as obsessed with it as he is after that. :3


	3. Break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The strain of leadership is about to break the Inquisitor, and Bull thinks he has a way to meet her needs.
> 
> A retelling of the first proposition scene in game. Smut, obviously.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had tried to finish this as a second submission for Iron Bull Appreciation Month on Tumblr but couldn't in time. Enjoy!

The way she looked at him didn't sit right with him.

When they had first met, she slashed through each enemy with her daggers with laughter in her mouth. She had a victorious curve to her smile and each movement was like a dance, celebrating the thrill of battle. It had distracted each Charger as they tried to focus on their own opponent. Each took a quick, curious look at the newcomer before going back to the matter at hand. When she saw Bull for the first time, her smirk had a pride and confidence that made Bull’s blood sing.

Now, as the months went on, she seemed to smile less and less when she thought no one was looking. They’d be walking down a trail and she’d be staring off into the distance, her gaze blank and weighty. She stood straighter, her posture rigid and tense. When she held her daggers, they would twitch and twirl in impatient, anxious hands. Her fighting style became furious. It was as if the demons she was trying to purge weren’t just the ones pouring out of the rifts. There was no laughter, only berserk yells and angry shouts. When she looked at him after, a hard set jaw had replaced her smile.

One night, a couple weeks later, had only confirmed his suspicions. The inhabitants of Skyhold had gathered in the main hall for dinner. Laughter, chatter, and the clanking of cups and utensils echoed off the stone walls.

Tonight, Bull was sitting close to the entrance to Josephine’s office. His ear caught yelling through the doors.

“Inquisitor, _please_ ,” he heard the ambassador implore.

“No,” Shenri replied. “I’ve waited long enough. I need to fight with my clan!”

“You’re needed here, Inquisitor,” Cullen said. “We have leads that we need to follow on Corypheus.

“I am well aware. But do you expect me to sit by when my clan could die on the morrow? When letter after letter, they have been in danger?!”

“We understand how you feel, Inquisitor, but our agents--”

“I know we have agents. But _I_ need to be there! I cannot sit by without knowing what may happen to them!”

“Inquisitor,” Leliana’s soft voice interrupted. “I have my best spies there as we speak with more joining them. We have eyes on your people. We can get them into the city without drawing the army’s attention. We have protected your clan thus far. Please trust us to do it once again.”

Silence followed. Footsteps headed towards the door which slammed open to reveal the Inquisitor. Bull took her in. Her mouth was in a grim line and her eyes were angry. She was agitated and tight as a bowstring. Her fingers curled into fists at her sides, the knuckles growing white. Her gaze lifted and locked eyes with his, and he saw the fire doused in that moment. Her eyes were watering. It made his stomach drop. Before he could do anything about it, she had turned away and marched towards her chambers.

He had been thinking of what to do to bring her back before she became lost in her agony. If he read her right, his solution would work with their friendship still intact. Perhaps it was time to propose it.

* * *

 Papers. So many _papers_. These people wrote reports on every single thing, and she had to also as their leader. Shenri’s fingers sifted through the thick pile of parchments Josephine had just handed her. She counted them, frowning as the number got higher and higher. She sighed in irritation. What did she have to do just to get a _nap_ in around here? She reined in the tears that wanted to form in her eyes. There was no _time_ to crawl into bed and sleep for weeks when Corypheus was still out there. 

She had just ascended the stairs when she looked up from her papers. She expected to find an empty room and instead found her qunari companion sitting on her bed.

“So, listen,” he began when she noticed him. “I’ve caught the hints. I get what you’re saying. You want to ride the Bull.”

Shenri couldn’t hide a smirk at that. Se didn’t think anything would come of all the flirtations she directed his way. He was her closest friend, and he always flirted back in a way that made her snort with pleased laughter. But if this was going the way she thought itwas, her reports were immediately her last priority. She crossed her arms and put her weight on one leg, waiting expectantly. She could’ve sworn she saw his eye trace the curve of her hip as she did so.

“Can’t say I blame you,” Bull continued, standing to make his way towards her. “But I’m not sure you know what you’re asking. Not sure if you’re ready for it.”

The elf wanted to scoff. She smirked instead, purring, “Ohhh, I’m ready for it.”

“See, you say that, but...you _really_ don’t know what that means.”

The Inquisitor quirked an eyebrow. She didn’t know what _more_ there could be other than the sex she wanted to have with him. But damn if she wasn’t burning with curiosity to find out. “So why don’t you show me?”

Shenri saw a glint of hunger in her friend’s eye. Before she realized what was happening, Iron Bull had brought her hands up over her head. He locked her wrists in one large hand and backed her up against the wall with a soft thud of her back. It was still enough to make Shenri emit a small gasp. Her eyes were still locked on his, and she saw a victorious fire in his eyes that she saw in him on the battlefield. A slight, smug smirk was on his lips as his eyes scrolled appreciatively over her arched body. The way he drunk her in like prey trapped in his grasp made her realize why he was hesitant.

_Power..._

Something in her expression must have tipped off his Ben-Hassrath molded instincts. He stared into her eyes hard, warning and wanting there in his expression. “Last chance,” he murmured.

She should have been afraid. She _was_ afraid, but only a little. Excitement and desperation had been pent up inside for too long. She had spent months wanting him and begging to find a way out of her melancholy. She didn't bother to hide her fox-like smirk. She tilted her chin up at him, challenging him with her eyes and confidence. She arched herself just an inch more. Her breasts pressed up, drawing his gaze. Her smirk widened as a growl rumbled through him. “A little slower and a _lot_ harder,” she answered, running her ankle along his calf.

He reflected on her consent for a moment, finding only enthusiasm in her face. He released her hands and picked her up by the waist. Her legs wrapped around his considerable waist. Her eyes never left his as she held onto him with her arms around his neck. She bit her rouged lip and rolled her hips against him. Heat filled her cheeks beneath the blush powdered on them. Bull growled and deposited her before the bed. He stood over her, straightening to his imposing, full height.

“I want to see you undress yourself,” he commanded, stepping back a few paces so her whole body was in his view.

She suppressed a shiver at the command in his voice, excited to give him a show. Not able to break her gaze away from his, she brought her hands up to her collar. Tantalizingly, she unhooked every little clasp from the top down at a slow pace. She liked the way his eye would break from hers to travel down the revealing stripe of skin. She watched his eye lock on every movement she made. It traveled over the curve of her shoulders and span of her belly when she let the top fall away from her body. It watched her fingers unlacing her pants. It roamed over the outline of her hips and legs when they pooled at her feet on the floor. She heard something between a hum and a growl when she unclasped her breast band and let her smalls fall. He just stared at her nude form for a moment. He looked at the ginger hair between her legs and watching her nipples pucker from exposure to the air. Shenri smiled as she watched a tent grow in his loose pants.

He met her eyes again in a satisfied stare and said between near gritted teeth, “Now, get on the bed.”

She obliged, smiling vixen-like as she sat on the bed, scooting so her head was on her pillows. He walked across the room, their eyes hungry on each other’s bodies as Bull reached her desk. He leaned against it all confidence and swagger. He unbuckled his harness, pulling it off his arm. When he turned to remove his boots, Shenri bit her lip, smiling wide and moaning at the view of his backside. Bull turned back towards her and undid his belt, letting it fall away onto the floor. He watched Shenri’s hand snake to her glistening lips as his fingers reached the laces of his pants.

“No,” he said to her. Her hand froze as she raised an eyebrow at him. “You will only watch. You won’t touch yourself unless I tell you to.”

He watched her swallow and nod, deciding to grip the sheets beneath her instead. Her chest rose with hard breaths as he untied the laces. He loosened the waistband and kicking off the rest of his clothing. He smirked at the way her lip dropped at the sight of his cock, her mouth forming a rouged O at the size. He rather liked the sight of her gaping mouth, imagined it around the head of his cock. Perhaps, if she still wanted to continue this, that would become a reality.

“Don’t worry,” he reassured her. “We’ll take it slow. Or I guess, _you’ll_ take it slow,” he jested.

The Inquisitor chuckled at that, her shoulders relaxing. She watched the Iron Bull close the distance between them, crawling on the bed to hover over her. He hummed his approval as she kept her hands fisted in the sheets.

“Boss--”

“Shenri,” she interrupted.

“Shenri,” he echoed, testing the name on his tongue. She gulped in an attempt to suppress the shiver that rolled through her when she heard her name on that tongue. She gasped at the feeling of Bull’s thumb working light circles on her clit as he motioned to the headboard. “You keep your hands up there. If you let go, I stop. If it becomes too much, you say ' _katoh_ ' and I _will_ stop. Now, tell me the rules we have.”

“I keep my hands on the headboard,” Shenri began, trying to focus as her pleasure heightened. “If I let go, you’ll stop. If I’m uncomfortable, I say _‘katoh_ ’ and you’ll stop.”

Without a moment’s notice, Bull flipped her over onto her front, and the elf felt a large smack on her ass. She yelped in equal parts pain and pleasure. “You forgot one, Shenri.”

 _What_? _He only said two. What was...?_

As she tried to remember, his hand came down on the other cheek and she cried out again. She knew she liked spanking. She had tried it with former lovers, if her weeping, pink lips were any sign. Her mind ran back through everything they had just done and she remembered.

“I don’t touch myself unless you say so!”

The Bull grinned and leaned over her. “Good girl,” he praised in her ear, suckling the lobe and kneading her red bum in one hand. His fingers came down to stroke along her slit, purring at the nectar dripping out of her. “Onto your back,” he ordered.

The elf obliged, looking at him for his next order.

“Spread your legs and put your hands up there.”

She did so, getting a good hold on the wood behind her and parting her legs. The Qunari was content to look for a moment, grinning like the cat the got the cream as he looked upon her. Her face was flushed and her eyes were glazed over in lust. He studied her perky tits heaving and her soft, toned belly fluttering with breath. He looked upon the damp red hair between her legs and the lips beneath, glistening with her honey.

“ _Fuck_ ,” he swore. “Do you know how beautiful and delicious you look, Shenri?”

Shenri only moaned in response, the compliment making her tingle in all the right places. She gasped as she felt the tip of his cock tease along her folds, getting it wet and ready. He hummed appreciatively as he watched her nectar drip and puddle beneath her.

“You’re so wet, I don’t think we’ll need the oil,” Bull groaned. He looked at her. “What’s the word if we do?”

“ _Katoh_ ,” she replied.

Bull smirked. “Good girl.”

Oh, she needed to stop melting every time he called her that.

He aligned himself up and pushed just the head in. The both of them groaned. He loved the feeling of her tight entrance sealing around him. She loved the feeling of his impressive girth already making her feel full. He gave a shallow thrust, just coating himself. Every movement brought him further in, continuing to lubricate his length and go slow. After a few moments, he had buried himself completely in her, stilling to let her adjust. _Fuck,_ he was huge, but he felt so _good_. She had never felt this full by any lover, and _Creators, please don’t let this be a one time thing._

“You all right, Shenri?” Bull asked, watching her face and feeling her passage relax as the seconds passed.

“Absolutely,” she purred with a smirk on her face.

Bull flashed a smirk back at her, loving her smile and flushed cheeks, and leaned down to kiss her. Shenri groaned into his mouth as he slipped his tongue in, and she sucked it into his mouth to make him groan too. He hummed happily as he broke it off, gripping her hips as he began to move.

Shenri saw stars. It took a particular angle or position to hit just the right spot inside of her. But here was Bull, reaching it with no problem. She wondered if it was the size of him only to grunt as his thrusts got just a little harder. One of his hands began to roam all over her. It grabbed one of her breasts and squeezing just enough to cause a little pain. Shenri gasped, finding she liked that more than she expected, him holding her in place as he fucked her. His hand moved to her face to cup her cheek. The Inquisitor turned her head to capture his thumb in her mouth, sucking on it and biting it. When her eyes met his, her cheeks hollowed around the digit, he growled and began pounding harder.

The Iron Bull was so large. She found herself walking the tightrope between pleasure and pain as he filled her to the brim. It was almost too much, too painful, but the pain was feeding her pleasure. It was taking her to a height she had never discovered before, and she was desperate to get there. She held the word _katoh_  on her tongue, wanting the Bull to bring her to that higher ground.

He had switched to grinding against her, giving her a break from the incessant prodding. He focused on rubbing himself against her clit, excited at her eyes rolling back at the motion.

“You feel good, Shenri?”

“You bet your sweet arse, I do,” she sighed, giving him a loopy grin.

“Ha!” he barked. He brought his thumb to her clit, rubbing it in soft circles. He watched with satisfaction as her head fall back in pleasure.

It wasn’t long before her knuckles were whitening on the headboard. She tucked her bottom lip between her teeth but a whimper still escaped her. “What do you want?” he asked.

“Harder...faster...” she moaned.

The plea in her voice had him growling and slamming into her, turning her mewls into grunts and wails. Bull watched her perky little tits bounce with every movement. He grabbed both in his hands, pinching and kneading just hard enough to get her gasping. He leaned over her to let his tongue work at her ear. Shenri whined as he licked and suckled his way down her neck. She reached up and the Bull felt her teeth sink into his neck. He roared in pleasure, pounding into her all the harder, grasping at every inch of her skin he could get. Shenri could feel it, the crest approaching. She felt herself tightening, her gasps reaching that note--

And then Bull stopped.

He halted one of his thrusts so his head just sat within her. Shenri couldn’t hold back a frustrated, childish cry from her qunari denying her pleasure. Bull’s hand at her throat silenced her, his squeeze only slight to let her speak.

“You wanna come, Shenri?”

“Yes,” she whined, nodding in desperation.

“You don’t sound like you want it that bad,” he commented, staying infuriatingly still.

“Oh, Bull, please!”

“Tell me what you want.”

“ _Sathan! Sathan!_ Please! I want to come! Please, let me come!”

And what a sight she was, the rouge on her lips smeared and her eyes streaming salt water and dark eye makeup. Her cheeks only turned redder from the lack of air. The way she looked at him was so full of pleading, how could he not let her?

“Come for me,” he ordered, relieving his grip on her neck and pounding into her again.

A rush of sweet oxygen filled her lungs, and in seconds, she was gone. She screamed, her lithe body bowing off the bed and her cunt drawing tight around Bull’s cock. He only thrusted a few more times into her channel before he was spilling into her and roaring out his own orgasm.

Shenri’s hands finally fell from the headboard and onto the bed as she tried to regain her senses. Bull’s head fell to her chest, his hot breaths warming her cooling skin. He felt the rapid beat of her heart beneath his cheek, her heaving breast cushioning his face. He lifted himself off her before he could crush her, pulling himself from her. Inquisitor felt the loss immediately; even when soft, his girth had filled her so. He searched his pants on the floor and fished a rag out of one of the pockets, returning to her to wipe her clean. Shenri moaned as the fabric scratched pleasantly against her lower lips. Bull chuckled at the sight. Her body was the most relaxed he’d seen in weeks. Her face was the picture of bliss, if the lazy smile, glazed eyes, and flushed cheeks were any sign. He tossed the rag to the ground and went to her nightstand where he poured her a glass of water. He crawled back onto the bed with it, sitting up and reaching for the satisfied elf next to him. She went into his lap, the qunari’s arms cradling her tired body. He offered her the glass and pulled up a blanket around her. He laughed as she gulped greedily and snuggled her head against one of his pecs. He gave her a moment to settled. His hands caressed her with an ironic politeness compared to their earlier activities.

“How do you feel?” he asked finally when her breathing had calmed.

When she didn’t respond, he looked down to find her sound asleep. Her parted mouth released the gentlest of snores. He chuckled, idly thinking she looked cute like this, and gently lifted her from his lap onto the bed. He rested her head on her pillows and pulled up the blankets around her. He watched her for a moment, liking the view of her resting for once with that apricot hair fanned about her. He dressed silently and left the room, knowing she would look for him when she woke.

* * *

Indeed, Shenri had come to find him later at the tavern. He had been taking a swig of ale from his cup when he locked eyes with her making her way to him. He hid his amusement at how _timid_ she was, her arm clutching at her elbow. Thankfully, her hunched shoulders weren't rigid. He could see how hard she was trying to maintain eye contact with him. She was biting her lip and her cheeks reddened with blush. He would’ve been lying if it didn’t make him want to take her until she couldn’t walk.

They walked back to her quarters in silence. Shenri’s gaze seemed to flit around in every direction but him. But as Bull laid down the ground rules, he found her gazing meeting his more trustingly.

“It’s a little unnerving that you have this down to a system,” the rogue admitted. She couldn’t decide what she spoke with more: anxiety or excitement.

“Systems are comfortable, and my goal...” Bull stood up and stalked towards her. Shenri felt herself straighten, her heartbeat racing and her breath hitching in anticipation. The qunari brought his hand up to gently grasp her chin, his forefinger teasing the skin of her throat on the way up. “...is for you to get _very comfortable._ ”

She suppressed a shiver at his words, wanting him to always talk like this to her. She knew this was a whole new world of pain and pleasure she was about to get introduced to. But there was no one she trusted more than Bull, and she could not deny how _wet_ she was right now.

“Take me,” she whispered hoarsely.

“Can do,” he purred, grabbing her around the waist and lifting her to him. The timidity was gone now, replaced by a fire in her eyes and an excited smile.

This was going to be fun.


End file.
